Red Herrings & White Elephants by Albert Jack

October 6th 2004

Extracts here

Introduction

Many times, during every single day, all of us will use what is known as an Idiom. Idioms are words and phrases, which those of us with a native English tongue take for granted as we have grown up to recognise their meaning. That is despite the words being used having absolutely nothing at all to do with the context of a conversation we are having. For example if I explained I am writing this preface 'off the cuff', and with no preparation, you would immediately recognise it as an unprepared piece being written in one take, spontaneously and then left as it is (which, by the way, it is). But why do I call that 'off the cuff' when it has nothing to do with my cuffs or being either on or off them. Or if I suggested everything in this book was absolutely true, I can emphasis that statement by insisting every word in here is 'straight from the horse's mouth'. Again, we all know that means it has come directly from the source of information and is therefore reliable. But I haven't got a horse. I have never spoken to one and unless I can find one that wins more often, even when I hedge my bets, then I might have nothing to do with any of the beasts again.

I did, when I was sitting in a pub with a friend, who was feeling a little groggy and under the weather, as he had been out painting the town red the previous night. I suggested a hair of the dog was in order and the bar-person, who was an English student from Columbia, and a very good one at that, thought we were crazy. She told us dogs weren't allowed in the pub. How we all laughed .

It was wintertime, and cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey, so cold in fact, I believe it was snowing in the ladies. So we sat by the fire, hair of dog in hand, and started wondering where those sayings originate and why they are so natural to use. We stayed in that pub for a few hours and the guvnor fetched us up a square meal, but before we all reached the end of our tethers I decided to leave for home. It was raining cats and dogs outside so I bit the bullet and made my way through the cold and started researching these little phrases. Within minutes I had discovered that many of them do have traceable origins and some even emerge from a particular event in history. Some are unbelievable but, by and large, many make immediate sense. Some have more than one suggested origin so, in which case, I have chosen the source that had the best supporting evidence. Therefore, I can assure the reader, there is only one cock and bull story among them.

I had been looking for ideas for a book of trivia for many months, that everybody in the English speaking world might gift to a friend or relative, but soon realised I now had my subject and it was time to knuckle down and write it. It took months of painstaking research, working mainly between the hours of closing time and opening time, before I finally had it in the bag and the fruit of that labour is now in your hand. However, I already know there are many missing idioms as there are, in fact, thousands of the rascals, so we just selected the best known sayings which have an interesting origin. The idea was not to create a definitive dictionary of well known phrases, but to choose the ones we could have some fun with and those that you, the reader who sent a shilling in my direction, would enjoy. Thanks to my brilliant illustrator, Ama Page, there are also some top notch cartoons to help you along the way. If this volume proves to be popular there will be a second edition that you are invited to contribute to by sending suggestions to info@albertjack.com.

But there is another benefit to reading this book. Everybody loves trivia, but no body likes a smart alec. So the next time you are caught in a corner with somebody talking a load of old codswallop, tell them where that phrase comes from and then start reciting a few of the other shaggy dog tales from this collection. That should get rid of them for you.

Albert Jack
Guildford, UK
August 2004